Alex Rodriguez, you’ve just tested positive for taking anabolic steroids to enhance your ability to play baseball! This must be a very exciting time for you, knowing that you’ll no longer be up for consideration for the Hall of Fame, that your fans who truly believed you were capable of doing what you’ve done without the help of performance enhancing drugs will no longer look up to you or think of you as an exemplary member of the sport, and that most women who at one time would have jumped at the opportunity to sleep with you will now simply think of how small the drugs have probably made your penis! What are you going to do next?
A-Rod: Oh shit.
3 years ago